If they could fix me
They would feel better-

About themselves.

They never listen
Only diagnose
And troubleshoot

Because to sit and be silent
Is to be powerless-

Be powerless with me.

And who can do that?

I’ve hid my pain
Behind a disguise

Because always
Every stop
Someone is there

Thinking
Foolishly, arrogantly
They hold the key

That one thing
That will “fix” me

But-
What if I’m not fixable?
What if I just am?

Another unsolicited talk
Another time around

Put in the position
To explain my pain
Defend it

Why should I?
Does a child give excuse?
For the monster in their closet?

Some parts of our story
Are too sad to speak

It hurts others too much to hear the truth.

Chronic pain
Has made me brave
So that I do not cry out

And chronic pain
Has made me a coward
That I cannot speak of it at all

So I let them think what they think
And know what they think they know

But if they listened
They’d give a great gift
Though it feel so small

It is true
The most powerful words
Are none at all

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